WingSpan Poetry Project

CULTIVATING EMPOWERMENT THROUGH POETRY


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If My Emotions Were Like the Stock Market

How much did I grow today?

Would it be in numbers

for what is that worth?

I am not a number.

And to who would it be in knowledge?

And if so, who would really care

and who really understand how to save it?

How do I invest that into me?

Where do I get the return?

And who is willing to buy it?

Is it supposed to be for sale anyway?

Questions, questions, questions.

For those who seem to have all the answers,

are they just selling dreams or buying dreams

and what if dreams are not the same.

I invested in these emotions so you and I

could have something together.

Everyone is in competition for some

but they haven’t yet achieved.

How measure me?

Look, I just grew up again.

Please come measure me again.

I just learned how to eat.

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Hope

It is the strength that makes belief.

Dreams do come true.

When the darkness ascends and rains

reach the light, colors bloom.

It’s the sway in the evergreens

firmly rooted, clinging to the wind.

It’s the force, ever gentle

pushing pebbles and stones

gurgling a harmony.

It’s the soothing comfort in a touch

a hug.

It’s the unexpected blessing

of joys once imagined.

It is the power of the moon

that directs the tides.

It is the chance taken

with the timing perfected.

It’s the fantasy turned

into a vision pursued.


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I Dream Of The Things That Are Impossible

 A place where I do not have to be responsible

in a subtle way I am lost to float still rooted

and I still grow even when

winds whip and pull.

 

I dream of someone strong

someone who is no longer

in the long lost fog

someone who found their niche

and now is never lost.

 

I dream of my Mom’s smile and how I

make her laugh when I go wild Winifred wide.

I dream of how you’ve always

been there for me as a child

who was so rebellious.

 

I dream of non-stopped strong stallions

of my tiger claws like talons

I dream I fall: I lost my balance

my eyes were locked on something

that had me astounded.

I dream I am surrounded

by beautiful flowers.

Looks are deceiving

so then I become devoured

 

How, oh, how do you have so much power,

you subconscious mind?

These dreams lie when I lie

in my bed. You are so strong

you must cry in your head

inches deep but I still

haven’t bled.

My muscles and my mind

finally connect–

I dream a gray scale where

my colors finally correct

fall off the cliff

and I’ve lost my breath.


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The Moths

If I stopped and thought

maybe the world can’t be saved

the pain was unbearable.

 

Do I notice really anything

being so full of energy  keeping busy

taking care of this and that and him and her

and them and everyone around me

just to keep from stopping

to notice me and feel

the pain of my own needs

telling myself

you’re not important

you’re not much

always telling myself I’ll figure it out

but hide your needs and take care of

everyone and everything around you.

 

If I stopped

the pain would be unbearable.

Let me hide in shadows of night

maybe in the rain or snow

to cry away the pain

for no one to notice

the only time I stopped

at night   masking the bad

with good thoughts

 

putting on a fake smile and putting myself last

to please others and not feel the pain of my life

to help others fix their lives

helped to pretend mine was ok

 

If I stopped the pain was unbearable.

I cannot fix the world.

I can only fix myself.


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The Slit of Sleep

“I dream a tale
of loneliness and alienation
as you pull up the knees
of your own sleep. . . “           Olena Davis, “The Silt of Sleep”

 

I dream about being noticed, heard or loved

around family that isn’t mine.

Though surrounded with people

I feel lonely, alienated

not heard or recognized.

 

Tired of the pain

I dream of butterflies

fluttering freedom of my faith so small

as a mustard seed releasing me

from alienation  loneliness

no longer weeping

filling my lungs with

sighs of relief.

 

Dreams of happiness–

a ceremony of finding the real me

love all around and connections

of experience in pain

no longer dream

but reality.

 

No more nightmares of fear

or sadness of another day.

I dream a new beginning

excited for another day

with God and the ones

He puts in my path

to bring happiness

No longer dream but reality

The spirit who gives life

sets you free from sin

and death.


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What did I see to be except myself?

I see damage from within

that is screaming so loud

but no one can hear.

 

So it gets damaged.

Damaged product,

go on whimpering

only talking with the eyes.

 

The eyes can never deceive

especially when the eyes are

as red as my pajamas

or my notebook

or my favorite team’s colors,

the 49’ers or Chicago Bulls.

 

The flare up the nostril has given me something

to be aware of: damage cannot be undone.

It hurts many people.

 

Damage can cause tears to flow like water

the heart to harden

the face to freeze

hands to shake

feet to run

mouth to be silent.

 

The moment the product is damaged

no one can take back what was done.

The moment has gotten still.

But for what?

 

Am I to fall to the floor and

dance because I see

a new blood line of ancestors

or should I fall because

 

I have been

you have been

we have been

damaged?

 

I am so weak in my throat.

I wish I had hot coffee to scorn

my damaged voice

so I can let out a cry.


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What Is A Sense of Mind as a Raven?

“The moon is sick
Of pulling at the river, and the river
fed up with swallowing the rain,
So, in my lukewarm coffee, in the bathroom
Mirror, there’s a restlessness. . .”                          Olena Davis, “The Panic Of Birds”

So my sense of mind

as a raven would be

shadowy and rainy,

drainy black-minded skies

apart from mobility.

 

Black minded raven said,

“Abide your senses.

Dream in mind scattered in

black shadowy paradise

of the raven staring.

Love eagle eyes

of our famous raven.”

 

Raven life is shadowy.  

Shadow of a window

when the raven is flying

flapping its wings of faith,

clapping at the sight

of the black shadowy raven­–

 

a mist passes the cloud

of rain and winds upward

your advantages of the black shadow

of pain released in the wings of the black

shadowy raven.